Christmas time is here. Check out www.isitchristmas.com tomorrow and it’ll confirm as much – December 25th is only hours away and with it will almost certainly come a massive rise in strange ‘reverse burglaries’.
What exactly is a ‘reverse burglary’ you ask? Well, you may recall last year I featured several posts from Force CID’s DS Kimo on our attempts to capture a suspect known to us as ‘Santa Clause’.
First of all there was our appeal for witnesses which was followed by the arrest of Clause the very next day. We thought we had the case nailed but then on Christmas Eve there was shocking news – our suspect turned out to be an imposter and the real Clause was still at large.
We’d failed and the consequence was that Clause broke into millions of houses around the world over the next few hours, stealing small amounts of brandy but leaving behind high value goods under people’s Christmas trees.
One year on and whilst the operation to capture Clause is ongoing, it’s looking unlikely that he’ll be located before he strikes again this evening.
As this is the case, the best I can offer is a few Christmas crime prevention tips from DS Kimo on how you can best safeguard your house against a strike by Clause himself.
Here’s the advice from the man in the know:
- Hide the mince pies – Never leave small plates of mince pies and a glass of brandy on open display. We know that Clause pretty much lives off these and they’re as good as an invitation for him to come in and wreak havoc.
- Block your chimney – Any hardware store should be able to supply the tools you’ll need to ensure that the chimney is not accessible. This is essential as 99% of the time Clause gains access to properties by the chimney.
- Throw away your ‘Santa Stop Here’ sign – At any other time of year would you put up a sign welcoming burglars? Of course not, don’t encourage the jolly fat man!
- Obstruct his landing strip – All available intel suggests that Santa reaches rooftops by using a magical sleigh drawn by reindeer. Litter your rooftop with barriers to frustrate his landing and maybe slop a little anti-vandal paint around too.
- Know what to look for – We believe Clause usually wears a bright red suit with white fur lining and heavy boots, he shouldn’t be hard to spot.
- Listen out - As well as wearing a bright red suit, Santa seems to have trouble keeping the noise down. If he’s nearby you will probably be able to hear him laughing loudly and encouraging his reindeer to take flight.
- Don’t write to him – Clause operates in a strange way, he seems to receive letters sent to him up the chimney and then a few weeks later arrives with many of the requested items. Don’t make it easy for him, if he doesn’t know what you want he may not come in the first place.
Now I’m on duty this evening on a special ‘Santa watch’ team so we’ll be keeping our eyes open for any Clause-related activity in the Walsall area and we’ll need you to do the same.
If you do suspect that you’ve seen Clause, please get in touch with me via Twitter and I’ll see what I can do about sending a car or two over.
Beyond this stay safe and have a very merry Christmas!